Sail the Seven Seas With Chefs Tesar and McCallister (For a Nominal Fee)

If your fantasy vacation includes foraging with Matt McCallister and gnawing on crab legs alongside John Tesar, surprise! Even the weirdest of dreams really do come true, provided you have a couple fat stacks of cash lying around. D Magazine is joining forces with Celebrity Cruises — the same company that brought you the illustrious Top Chef cruise — for a seven-night voyage through Alaska with both of the aforementioned chefs on board, along with seafood guru Jon Alexis of TJ's Seafood Market. Time to start raiding those piggy banks, though, because the cruise starts at around $2,200 a person.

Folks who dole out the necessary cash to climb aboard for this "unforgettable vacation at sea" will also "get an up-close-and-person look at the commercial crabbing industry" and go on a rafting trip led by D's Nancy Nichols. There will also be seafood cooking demos by Tesar, but there's sadly no mention of a "How to Angry-Tweet Your Way to Fame and Fortune" seminar from the Knife chef.

Clearly Alexis is so pumped for the cruise that he was willing to mount a plastic walrus to promote the trip. Tesar, meanwhile, has nicknamed the ferocious polar bear he's staring down after a certain food critic in town. While $2,200 is probably a fair price for an Alaskan cruise these days, that's equal to two months' rent or more for many; then again, perhaps getting "Baked in Alaska" (side note: weed will be legal in Alaska come February 24) with some of the city's best chefs is priceless.

Would you drop thousands to go snarf crab legs with this crew in Alaska? Do tell in the comments.